


An Act of Love

by emikoo



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Mutual Pining, One Shot, mentions of the other members
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:35:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23765455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emikoo/pseuds/emikoo
Summary: To love each other without restrictions. That would be enough.
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Kang Seulgi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 150





	An Act of Love

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Honne's Warm on a cold night and Raveena's Still Dreaming. Give it a listen! Both of these songs were on repeat as I wrote this lol

It was Christmas eve, and the streets of Seoul were filled ornamental lights, decorations were hanging on every store, and carols were blasting through the speakers. Despite the late hour, people were still outside, celebrating with friends, family, or maybe their significant others. Restaurants were still open, shopping districts were crowded, and the roads were filled with vehicles.

It was a holiday, but the girl group spent most of their day at the studio, practicing for their special stage at an upcoming awards show. After rehearsals, Soo-young and Yeri went back to their parent’s home to celebrate the holiday with their families. Seung-wan, on the other hand, went straight to Incheon Airport to pick up her parents who decided to stay in Korea until the New Year came. Leaving only Seulgi and Joohyun, who both still had a schedule the following day.

Joohyun was set to be the MC on the awards show, while Seulgi had a collaborative performance with other idols, which left both of them unable to spend time with their families for the holiday. 

With the other members absent, their ride home was quiet, with only the steady sound of the car engine, and the occasional tick of the blinker every time their driver would make a turn. Seulgi was leaning on the window, fixated on the busy streets, focusing on the people they were passing by. Beside her, Joohyun had her earphones on, quietly humming to ‘Wish Tree’. 

As they got near their dorm, the Christmas lights and crowds became scarce. Residential areas were always quiet. 

In a few minutes, Seulgi’s view eventually showed the entrance to their building, the lobby brightly lit with a Christmas tree at the center. The doorman opened the van’s door for them the moment the driver pulled on the handbrake, greeting them with a bow as they both got out of the vehicle.

Their manager got out of the van with them and opened the van’s trunk, pulling out their sports bag which contained the clothes they used for practice. He insisted on walking them up to their floor, but Joohyun stopped him, telling him that he has done enough for the day. 

The two girls snatched their respective sports bags from their manager’s hands, and after greeting Merry Christmas and thanking both him and the driver for their hard work, Seulgi and Joohyun headed up to their dorm to call it a day.

As they unlocked their door, they were greeted by the darkness of their empty dorm. Seulgi reached for the switch to turn on the lights. The two girls removed their shoes by the entrance, and with the heater set quite hight, they proceeded to take their coats off. 

“ _Unnie_ , do you want to go shower first? Just tell me when you’re done. I’ll wash up after you.”

She was on her way to her room when she felt Joohyun’s arms wrap around her waist, her chest pressed against Seulgi’s back. 

They haven’t told anyone about the change in their relationship, not even their members. It’s not that they don’t trust them, or that they’d think they would be greeted with judging eyes, they were just incredibly afraid. They know that what they were doing was risky, and knowing how the five of them joke around and grill each other during interviews, a slip of the tongue would be disastrous.

Being in the entertainment industry, where merely dating was considered a scandal. What more would happen, if two girls who were in the same group, were caught dating? It would most definitely cause an uproar. Homosexuality is still not generally accepted in Korea. Being caught would ruin their careers. Not only them but the other members as well. Keeping quiet was for the best.

“Seulgi...” Joohyun stared, hesitation evident in her voice. It’s crazy how Joohyun still gets a bit embarrassed when she asks Seulgi for intimate favors when they've been sleeping around with each other for over a year now.

The shift in their relationship made Seulgi come to know Joohyun more than she can ever imagine if they had remained friends. 

"You want to wash up together?" Seulgi continued for her, saving Joohyun from her unneeded embarrassment. She felt Joohyun nod against her back.

“You’re not tired?” Seulgi asked. She held the arms that were wrapped tightly around her. She felt Joohyun’s head move sideways against her back, telling her that she wasn’t.

“It’s fine, we rarely get a chance to be alone. Spend the night with me?" Joohyun replied.

Seulgi turned around facing the doe-eyed woman who was now looking up to her. 

“Thought you’d never ask," she cupped Joohyun’s face, giving her a smile and peck on the lips.

"I’ll get the tub ready. Go and get changed.” she continued.

-

Seulgi started to doubt herself the moment she and Joohyun started to get close during their trainee years. Before meeting Joohyun, she was never attracted to women at all. All her past crushes have been men. 

So when she started to feel different around Joohyun, it was the most confusing thing she experienced as a teen. She would always catch herself staring a bit too long at Joohyun during practice. Her heart would thump loudly when she sees her approaching. Sometimes she’d stutter when she spoke to her. The way she behaved was incredibly frustrating. She couldn’t understand why she was acting this way around some pretty girl. 

But despite the nervous wreck that she was when she was around Joohyun, she always longed to spend time with her. If they weren’t together, her mind would wander to what the older girl was doing. Often, she’d go to a convenience store to buy herself some snacks, and end up buying some for Joohyun as well, and Joohyun always did the same for her.

Seulgi always tells herself it was completely normal. Friends do this all the time, but why does it feel like her heart would burst whenever Joohyun would flash her a warm smile, and look at her adoringly when she thanked her?

Day and night, Joohyun was running on her mind.

Eventually, Seulgi became calmer around Joohyun. She started to acknowledge what she was feeling as well. She couldn’t deny it any longer, she was crushing hard on her. 

The more time they spent together, Seulgi started to notice little things about Joohyun’s behavior around her. 

Everyone knew how much Joohyun liked skinship. She did it to all of her friends. But sometimes she kind of gets overboard. Specifically, with Seulgi.

There was that one time when Joohyun was so afraid during a thunderstorm. To Seulgi's surprise, Joohyun slipped into her bed and wanted to sleep together. 

Seulgi hadn’t slept a wink that night. She can still remember how rigid her whole body went when Joohyun snuggled closer and wrapped her arms tightly around her.

She wondered if she’s ever done that with her other friends. So when she got the chance to talk to one of Joohyun’s past roommates, she smoothly brought up the topic, and the roommate only answered in surprise.

“No, she’s never done that. Ever. Even during thunderstorms. She must have been incredibly scared that night if she slipped into your bed. If there’s one thing I learned from the time when we were roomies, it’s that Joohyun liked sleeping on her own.” the girl replied.

Then there was also that habit. Sometimes— well, actually, _most of the time,_ whenever Seulgi was speaking, Joohyun’s eyes would travel down to her lips. It was the weirdest thing ever. At first, she didn’t pay much attention to it, but it happened _so often._

So she thought that maybe, _just maybe,_ Joohyun and her were on the same page.

She didn’t make a move though. Never even considered it. She had always been more of the passive type. Plus, if it wasn’t mutual, it would definitely destroy their friendship, and that would break her heart a million times more than getting rejected. She can be happy with just how the way things were. 

-

When they debuted, Seulgi hoped her feelings would eventually fade away, but what happened was the complete opposite. 

It was getting harder to control her feelings. The more she tried to bury her feelings within the depths of her heart, the more she felt like she was a ticking time bomb ready to explode.

She would get jealous every time she sees guys staring at Joohyun. Sometimes, she just wants to cover her with a blanket and protect her from all those eyes.

Of course, she couldn’t blame them. Joohyun was so incredibly beautiful. Even on interviews, Seulgi couldn’t stop gushing about Joohyun.

Other members would always laugh at her, thinking that she does it to tease their leader, and although Joohyun laughs at her as well, giving her a playful push to stop her, there’s always something with the way she smiles and how her face brightens up every time Seulgi tells her she’s pretty.

There would also be times when they'd be alone together. When they'd hang out or eat with just the two of them, and a comfortable silence would settle between them. 

On one of these moments, Seulgi took the chance to stare at Joohyun while she was unaware, and the affection and desire she had for her suddenly consumed her emotions.

Her chest tightened, her stomach flipped, her hands curled up into fists, her nails dug into her palms. She felt like she was going to burst. 

She realized she was holding her breath and suddenly let out a huge exhale and gasped for air, startling Joohyun. 

"Goodness, are you alright?" Joohyun asked, concern shown all over her face.

It took Seulgi a whole lot of energy to keep herself from pouring out the truth. 

_No, I'm not. I want you, I'm crazy about you..._

_I'm in love with you._

Instead, she shook her head and waved her hands at Joohyun, assuring her that she was fine.

"It's okay, everything fine. _"_

Since then she avoided staring at Joohyun for too long.

-

Nothing happened between them. Not until a few years after their debut. 

They were out of the country for their first solo concert tour, and after a game of rock, paper, scissors, their rooms were assigned. Seung-wan, Sooyoung, and Yeri on the room with two beds, while Seulgi and Joohyun would be sharing the room with one king-sized bed. It’s been so long since the last time they became roommates. Ever since they debuted, Seulgi and Wendy had been sharing a room in their dorm. 

Seulgi couldn’t tell if she was happy or nervous about the assignment. Memories of the time Joohyun slipped into her bed and held onto her tightly during thunderstorms came rushing back to her. She shook her head as if to erase her thoughts. She tells herself everything would be fine. 

She’s been keeping her distance from Joohyun for quite a while now. But just a bit, enough for the older girl not to notice. Back then they were inseparable, with only the two of them. Then Yeri came, then Seung-wan, and lastly Sooyoung. So now, both their attention was divided to each member. Especially Joohyun, since she was, after all, their leader.

It was Soo-young’s birthday. So that night they ordered room service and went to the nearby convenience store in their hotel to buy some alcohol for the celebration. Luckily, the store had Soju, which Sooyoung and Joohyun preferred more than beer. The other three weren’t much picky with alcohol and just tend to drink whatever was available. So the girls bought two six-packs of beer, and four bottles of Soju, and drank past midnight at Sooyoung, Seung-wan, and Yeri’s hotel room. It was fortunate that their concert was scheduled the day after tomorrow. They could get drunk as much as they want.

By the time they finished all of it, it was already past 1 in the morning. Sooyoung was slurring on her words, speaking words of wisdom to Seungwan who wasn’t at all listening, as she searched up karaoke songs on Youtube and sang her heart out to a ballad. She was feeling the song very much and looked like she going to cry any minute. Seulgi and Yeri, on the other hand, were dancing wildly to Seungwan’s ballad as if they were in a nightclub. Joohyun was laughing at the two dancing queens, holding up her phone to take a video of the chaos, when Yeri suddenly started to gag as if she was going to puke. This garnered high pitched screams from the other girls, and Joohyun came dragging Yeri to the toilet in a blink of an eye.

As soon as Yeri and Joohyun re-emerged from the toilet, the younger girl came crashing down on the nearest bed, face down, snoring the moment she landed.

“All right, let’s wrap this up. Everyone’s drunk. Let’s have a good night’s sleep.” Joohyun announced.

They cleaned up the bottles and cans of beer, and after saying their goodnights and greeting Sooyoung ‘Happy Birthday’ one last time, Seulgi and Joohyun went back to their room.

It was true that Seulgi’s alcohol tolerance has improved since the first time she started drinking. But she was still considered a lightweight despite her slight improvement, and right now she was most definitely drunk, and when Seulgi was drunk, Seulgi liked to talk. Words always came spilling from her mouth, most of it nonsense, sometimes just some weird sounds that children usually make.

She didn’t talk about nonsense that night though. 

When you’re drunk, at least when you’re not _blackout drunk,_ you’re definitely aware of what you’re doing, what you’re saying, and you most definitely remember what you did the morning after. 

With alcohol, you’re courage skyrockets to its peak level, while you’re ability to think about the consequences of your actions drops.

The two girls went straight to their shared bed the moment they got back to their room. Joohyun was lying on her back and had her arm over her eyes, while Seulgi turned to her side so that she could stare at her roommate. With only the bedside lamp turned on, the room was quite dim but Joohyun still looked breathtakingly beautiful. She always looked good with any lighting, Seulgi thought to herself.

“Joohyunnie, are you awake?” Seulgi called out.

“Hm?”

Having her question answered, Seulgi scooted closer. She pulled on Joohyun’s arm, to spread it across the bed so she could easily lay her head on Joohyun’s arm.

Surprised with Seulgi’s sudden action, Joohyun removed the arm across her eyes to look at the girl whose face was now buried at the nook of her neck. Although Seulgi has learned to be more comfortable with skinship, it was still rare that she’d be the first one to initiate it. Joohyun could feel Seulgi’s warm, and gentle breathe which reeked of the sweet scent of Soju and beer against her neck.

“You know Seul, aside from being a talkative drunk, you’re awfully quite clingy as well.” Joohyun kidded.

She was expecting to get a laugh from the drunk girl who was sprawled over her, but Seulgi remained quiet and ignored her teasing. She moved her head lower so that she was resting her ear against Joohyun's chest.

" _Unnie_ , I have to tell you something..." Seulgi started. For the first time, she didn't think twice on what she was about to do.

"There's someone I like. To be honest, I think I was attracted to this person from the first moment we met. We've been friends for so long now, and for as long as I remember, I was in love with this person through most of it and I still am." Seulgi paused to catch her breath.

"Who is this?" Joohyun asked.

Not answering her question, Seulgi continued. "This person is amazing, perfect almost. I don't even know how I could've gotten through that slump during our trainee years if it wasn't for this friend. This person took really good care of me and still does. I love this person _so much,_ it started to hurt." 

Seulgi remained glued to Joohyun's chest. She could feel a lump forming on her throat, and her eyes were starting to burn. She knew the moment she spoke again she'd start crying. She felt guilty for what she was doing. She knew her feelings would be a burden to Joohyun who's been carrying a lot of responsibilities ever since she became their leader. 

The silence between them seemed to last for eternity. She started to hear Joohyun's heartbeat clearly, rapidly.

"Nobody took care of you the way I did during that slump, Seulgi." Joohyun finally said, breaking the silence.

"That's right," Seulgi replied, and just as she had expected her voice broke the moment she spoke the words. She released Joohyun from her embrace and sat on the bed. She kept her head down so her hair would cover her face. A habit she did whenever she cried.

"It's you. I'm talking about you," she confessed. The more she tried to stop herself from crying the harder it was to contain her sobs. 

"Joohyunnie, I'm in love with you. I'm _so_ _in love_ with you, I'm sorry." she continued between sobs. Her shoulders started to hitch as she continued to speak.

Joohyun brushed Seulgi's hair away from her face and cupped her cheeks, forcing Seulgi to look at her face. One eyebrow slightly raised than the other, Joohyun gave her an intense gaze. Seulgi couldn't tell what it means. Shock? Confusion?

"You're sure this isn't the alcohol speaking?" Joohyun asked her.

"It's not." Seulgi managed to say, barely a whisper.

"Tell me you won't forget any of this in the morning."

"I won't."

"Whatever happens tonight, promise me you won't regret it."

"I promise."

"Then you don't have to be sorry, because I know I won't."

With everything cleared up, Joohyun crushed her lips against Seulgi's. Upon instinct, Seulgi closed her eyes and opened her lips in response, granting Joohyun to slip her tongue inside of Seulgi's mouth. 

Seulgi's mind went blank. She grabbed Joohyun's hips and pulled her closer, while Joohyun's hands traveled down to Seulgi's shoulders for support. She bit onto Joohyun's lower lip, and Joohyun let out a whimper. Seulgi went crazy at the response and kissed Joohyun harder.

Breaking the kiss, Joohyun tried to catch her breath, throwing her head back as Seulgi continued to place wet kisses on her. Starting on her jaw, traveling to her neck, down to her collar bone.

"Sleep with me," Joohyun said, her voice heavy with lust.

Seulgi had no choice but to comply.

During interviews, they'd always get questions such as _'What was the moment when you were the happiest?'_

If Seulgi could be truthful, she would say it was that night.

-

The gentle swish of the water echoed through the bathroom as Seulgi continued to wash Joohyun's back. She watched the water drip from the bath sponge as she pressed it against Joohyun's shoulder, removing any remnants of soap. The tips of her fingers had started to wrinkle, reminding her that they've spent too much time in the tub.

Seulgi placed a soft kiss upon Joohyun's shoulder and whispered in her ear.

“Your room, or mine?”

“Yours, I like sleeping with your wool blanket.”

Joohyun made a rule. They can only sleep together if no other member was with them at the dorm. They can’t take the risk of the others finding out, they had to be extra cautious. Joohyun had a lot of self-control, but Seulgi usually had a harder time with it. It wasn’t often that they’d get the dorm to themselves. Sometimes, just to tease Joohyun, she’d steal a kiss, when the others weren’t looking. This usually earned her a slap on the arm and glare from Joohyun.

But when they finally get to be alone, Joohyun changes completely. She turned needy, _hungry_ , letting Seulgi know that she craved for her touch just as much as she did.

Contrary to their first time, which consisted a lot of fumbling around and had an air filled with uncertainty and awkwardness. The two of them had finally memorized every inch of each other’s body, knowing full well the other’s desires and weaknesses during the act of passion, the spot to touch, the amount of pressure to apply, and how to elicit a moan from the other’s mouth.

Seulgi and Joohyun had mastered the art of loving each other.

They took everything slowly, savoring the moment they rarely had, until their arousal would build up and a fire would spark between them, turning both of them starving for each other.

Despite the cold December night, their bodies had turned damp, their hands slipping even with the tight grip they had on one another. The heavy odor of sweat started to fill the room. They continued to press against each other, never letting go until they succumbed to the overwhelming pleasure of making love.

-

The beam of the late sunrise woke Joohyun up from her sleep. She glanced at the woman enwrapped around her arms, her breath steady and warm against Joohyun’s chest. She hated waking Seulgi up when she looked so cozy and at peace. She wished they could stay like this forever, without a care in the world. Satisfied with just the comfort of each other’s arms.

“Seulgi, wake up.” She whispered, gently shaking Seulgi’s shoulder, but the girl seemed deep in sleep.

Deciding to let Seulgi sleep a bit more, Joohyun tried to entangle herself from Seulgi’s embrace. She grabbed the arm around her waist to remove it. Sensing her attempt, Seulgi whined and tightened her arms, making it impossible for Joohyun to escape.

“Please, don’t go _._ Stay with me a bit longer.”

Heaving a deep sigh, Joohyun gave Seulgi’s head a gentle stroke, running her fingers through the woman’s soft hair, and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“We have to get up. The girls might be here any minute.”

“Fine,” Seulgi said, giving up. She reluctantly loosened her arms around Joohyun.

“Come on, get dressed. I’ll make you breakfast.” Joohyun said as she got up. She went to her room to get some clothes to put on and went straight to the kitchen.

As she started to fry some eggs, Seulgi, now fully dressed as well, hugged her from behind and rested her chin on Joohyun’s shoulder. They spent the last minutes of the morning enjoying the mundane routines any normal couple should be able to do. Joohyun dreamed of the day where she could love Seulgi without the fear of being judged, without the threat of ruining their careers by simply being in love.

To love each other without restrictions. That would be enough.

**Author's Note:**

> A seulrene subunit just got announced today, so i tried to finish this fic lol Being a seulrene stan never felt so good! This is actually the first one I've done, so forgive me for any shortcomings


End file.
